Midway through the 2007-08 NBA season, about the time when there was a better chance for a lightning strike than Ben Wallace sinking two consecutive free throws, I felt compelled to address the elephant in the gym. “Would you ever consider shooting underhanded?” I asked Big Ben after a practice. After all, countless studies have told us that the “granny style” is the easiest, most scientific-friendly way to shoot uncontested 15-footers, right?
Wallace paused for a moment with a quizzical look on his face. Then he uttered three brutally honest words that told us where the pro game was headed at the time. “That ain’t basketball.”
In other words, it was better to suck but look cool than help your team but look like a sissy. Wallace wasn’t alone, of course. Not since Hall of Famer Rick Barry (career percentage: .900) retired four decades ago has a player shot free throws between his legs on a regular basis. (Big Ben would have had to sink 12,943 freebies in a row to strike The Big Nine-Oh-Oh.)
Meanwhile, while we brag that modern athletes are bigger, stronger and faster these days, league-wide free-throw accuracy hasn’t changed much since the dawn of the shot-clock era. Of the 50 worst free-throw shooters in league history (minimum 400 career attempts), 31 threw up bricks in this millennium. And seven are still active.
These are the all-time suspects, one brick at a time.
25. Earl Cureton
Earl Cureton, left, played on seven NBA teams in his career. Ron Frehm / AP Photo
Position: Center/forward
Career: 1980-89, 1990-91, 1993-94, 1996-97 (12 seasons)
Teams: Philadelphia 76ers, Detroit Pistons, Chicago Bulls, Los Angeles Clippers, Charlotte Hornets, Houston Rockets, Toronto Raptors
Free-throw attempts: 530
Free throws made: 985
Free-throw percentage: .538
24. Olden Polynice
Olden Polynice, left, scored 8,265 points in his career. Kevork Djansezian / AP Photo
Position: Center
Career: 1987-2001, 2003-04 (15 seasons)
Teams: Seattle SuperSonics, Los Angeles Clippers, Detroit Pistons, Sacramento Kings, Utah Jazz
Free-throw attempts: 2,141
Free throws made: 1,146
Free-throw percentage: .535
16. Bo Outlaw
Orlando Magic players Bo Outlaw, left, Travis Diener, second from left, Tony Battie and Pat Garrity (8) celebrate in the fourth quarter as the Magic beat the Minnesota Timberwolves 109-98 in an NBA basketball game in Minneapolis, Saturday, Nov. 11, 2006. Andy King / AP Photo
Position: Forward
Career: 1993-2008 (15 seasons)
Teams: Utah Jazz, Minnesota Timberwolves, Denver Nuggets, Memphis Grizzlies, Sacramento Kings
Free-throw attempts: 710
Free throws made: 413
Free-throw percentage: .521
2. Lou Amundson
Lou Amundson, left, went to UNLV. Paul Connors / AP Photo
Position: Forward
Career: 2006-16 (10 seasons)
Teams: Utah Jazz, Philadelphia 76ers, Phoenix Suns, Golden State Warriors, Indiana Pacers, Minnesota Timberwolves, Charlotte Hornets/Pelicans, Chicago Bulls, Cleveland Cavaliers, New York Knicks
Free-throw attempts: 603
Free throws made: 268
Free-throw percentage: .444
Bottom Line: Lou Amundson
Lou Amundson, right, played on 10 NBA teams. Jim Mone / AP Photo
In a career full of “my bads,” forehead slaps, chest taps and shoulder shrugs, “Lightning Lou” (per Shaquille O’Neal, natch) shot less than 50 percent with no fewer than 10 different teams.
In a 2016 game, he threatened to become the first player to shatter a backboard on a free throw.
The seismic waves registered 8.5 on the Wallace Scale, which takes us to No. 1.
1. Ben Wallace
Ben Wallace was undrafted. Mark Duncan / AP Photo
Position: Center-forward
Career: 1996-2012 (16 seasons)
Teams: Washington Bullets/Wizards, Orlando Magic, Detroit Pistons, Chicago Bulls, Cleveland Cavaliers
Free-throw attempts: 2,679
Free throws made: 1,109
Free-throw percentage: .414
Bottom line: In 16 seasons, the captain of Mount Brickmore shot less than 40 percent at the free throw line a half-dozen times. To put this into perspective, Stephen Curry would have a better chance to drain a 3-pointer (career rate: .435) with someone in his grill than Big Ben did on a 15-footer with nobody in his way. To steal his line, that ain’t basketball. That’s downright embarrassin’.
